Monday, February 16, 2009

Srsly #2

This one is for my upstairs neighbor, who for some reason works the oddest hours . . .

I'm thinking you must be a bartender, or a pimp. That would explain the clackety-clack of the hoochie-mama shoes going up the cement stairs outside my bedroom at 2am on weeknights. As well as the weekly perpetual toilet-flushing and barfathon (yeah, that one's fun to wake up to).

Oh, and let's not forget the Sunday morning sex. I don't know how you manage it, but every frickin' weekend you're at it. Do you *have* to bang your flavor of the week BEFORE people (okay, not me, but other people) get up to go to church? You can't wait until the afternoon like the rest of us? I mean, some of us only get to sleep in one day a week, and guess what - it's SUNDAY.

At the very least, show some neighborly consideration and tighten the bolts on your headboard.

And dude - they're faking it. You have no rhythm.



Eden Hail said...

You do know you win the internet?


Unhinged said...

You poor girl, you have my sympathy. This certainly beats Elephant Woman, who likes to run down the hallway in her heels (always after midnight). Last week, the run was accompanied by her yelling all the way up to the third floor. If anyone can raise the dead by noise, it's the Elephant Woman.

And then there's the sneezer! I don't know where he lives, but his windows are always open. He sneezes like all hell is breaking loose, and he HATES sneezing. There's just this sound in his voice--like sneezing is an inconvenience. It makes me laugh every time.

Gwenny said...

I won the internet? WOOT!!!! Does this mean I can blast all spammers into another dimension?

Andi . . . lol! I feel ya! The joys of lots of people living in a small amount of space. *rolls eyes*

Thomma Lyn said...

I don't know whether to laugh or cry! ;)

Gwen said...

Well, it'd definitely meant to make you laugh. Though I've admittedly wanted to tear my hair out over it before. o.o

Heather said...

I'm thinking your neighbors must know my neighbors. And in addition to tightening the bolts on the bed? Pull the damn thing away from the wall a couple inches--then you wouldn't have to worry about the headboard banging against it. As you said, "Srsly."