Thursday, October 23, 2008

Unwillingly Dammed


I'll try to make this post more ponderous and less whiny, but I can't make any guarantees to that effect. As you can probably tell, my blogging has been non-existent lately. That's fitting in right along with all other forms of writing. The honest-to-goodness truth, not an excuse but a reason, is simply this: I haven't had the time.

I'm the sort of person who over-extends herself on a regular basis. Being short on time is something I'm used to. Being under a deadline? No problem. Having lots of work piled up on me? Yeah, that's old hat. Running a website, two and a half blogs and a forum in addition to twittering and poking my nose in various cyber-spaces? Well... yeah.

But somehow, my firm purchase on the actual work of writing (the art of applying but to chair and fingers to keyboard) has slid towards non-existent. I'm chewing through lots of books on the bus ride to and from my new job - but that is really just making my hunkering to write even worse. And here comes the whining...

A lot of writers complain that they sit down and the words won't come. Or that they find themselves shuffling writing to the bottom of their list and making excuses *not* to do it. At the moment, I envy those writers. If I had the time to talk myself out of writing . . . well, I'd be writing. Sadly, my case is something else entirely. The words are there. The ideas are flowing. They are just piling up behind the dam built by my brain in order to let me deal with the more pertinent issue of . . . well, survival. (At the moment.) I have so much work to do, I can't even allow myself to dawdle in my make believe worlds, or to ponder characters or stories, or anything. I'm effectively cut-off from my creative flow. And not by choice. It's like a forced block. And it's frustrating as hell.

It comes down to this: I miss my WIP. I *WANT* to dive into it, to finish the story of the people I've come to care deeply about in the past months. I *WANT* to add in my new ideas, and yes, yes - even to trudge through edits because I know the editing process inside-out now and know that the end-product will be more than worth it. But . . . woe is me . . . I can't do that. Yet.

Soon. Soon, I keep telling myself. I miss all of you guys too - if there is anyone out there still reading this. I'll say the same to you. Soon I will be filling your head with fluff, or maybe even something more substantial, telling your what I've read and what I thought, expanding my reperatoire of writing-issues, finally tackling the projects I've been talking 'bout for months, and generally poking my nose in your business again. Soon.

Unwillingly Dammed Writer


Brenda ND said...

Oh well, come back when you can.

Gwen said...

Thanks Brenda! :)

SciFiGuy said...

Don't worry, we keep checking in to see everything is OK. No one is going to abandon you because life gets in the way.

Gwen said...

Thanks, Doug. That's good to hear! =)

Thomma Lyn said...

Hang in there, Gwen! I'm still reading. :) I understand busy -- I have a lot on my plate, too. Doing well on my WIP, but I've cut back somewhat on blogging -- oh, how I wish there were more than twenty-four hours in a day, or that people didn't have to sleep!

Tilia said...

*huggles* *manyhuggles*


Gwen said...

Thanks for the support, everyone. Really. I am slowly getting back in the swing of things. For a lot of people, this time of year gets crazier, but I find myself looking forward to a looooong, quiet winter - with lots of reading, writing, blogging and general traipsing around cyber-land. ;)